Sunday, November 13, 2016

video

Friday, February 20, 2015

The Timekper by Thomas M. Kelly

The Timekeeper... a play by Thomas M. Kelly
To order a copy ... tddtheatre@aol.com

Wednesday, October 16, 2013

What shutdown?

Overheard while waiting for my Pumpkin Spice Latte

BLUE SUIT:
Congressional Republicans are becoming more and more disgusting.   The country is going to hell in a hand basket woven by the Republicans in congress.   For shame!
BLACK DRESS:
Where have you been all my life?!
BLUE SUIT: 
Haha!   I have been right here.   Even if Obama and the Democrats get everything they want ... And they will... Because Mr. Obama is the consummate political gambler..., it does not fix anything in the end.
BLACK DRESS:
Don't blame just the Republicans.   They are ALL playing a game with our future, Harry Reid and Obama are just as much to blame.   Obama won't talk with the House,,,, blames everyone else for what is going on,... puts down the Tea Party group.   Obama seems to forget that they were all elected by a great many people.   He'd truly rather be playing golf or taking vacations with his family costing tax players millions of dollars, per vacation.   During this shut down, the Obama told his people to make it is hard on Americans as possible.   This is a leader? Our debt has almost doubled since he is in office, and he just wants to spend more.   Et cetera.   Et cetera.   Don't just listen to nightly news or CNN, get your facts from other sources.   The truth is out there.   Figure it out before this country goes down to 3rd world status, or worse.
POLKA-DOT DRESS:
Where do you get your so-called 'facts'?   Vacations with his family costing tax players millions of dollars?   You're sick!   Actually, a lot of those tea-party Republicans are representing a very SMALL percent of their population because of gerrymandering.   They're not accurately representing their constituents.
BLACK DRESS:
Regardless, they were elected by a majority of the voters in their districts.   You have to give them credit for sticking to their promises to their constituents to help reduce the debt and spending and to fight against the ever increasing control of the government in our lives.   As witnessed by Bengazi; the IRS scandal; data collecting and more.   This is not the free country where I was raised.
BLUE SUIT: 
Sorry, you are so wrong in so many ways.   The mess we are in is a direct result of Republican's wanting to destroy Obamacare at any cost to the country and by a small group of radical tea party extremists who use lies and misinformation including calling the president a radical Muslim to get their warped messages across.   You need to get your facts straight.   You can begin by stop listening to "Rushbo" and FOX news.
BLACK DRESS:
There is more information out there than Fox News.   You want to talk about Obamacare - the Affordable Care Act?   Too many people are not aware that they are the same thing...Harry Reid and Nancy Pelosi rammed this through against the wishes of at least 73 percent of the population according to ... Yes Fox News.   Our politicians voted for a 2000 + page bill without reading it.   Who does that?   Remember Nancy Pelosi saying,"We'll have to pass it so we can find out what is in it".   Is that anyway to run a country?   I have other things to do so, see ya' later .
POLKA-DOT DRESS:
Some people are still buying that increasing control, Benghazi, etc.   Where were they were Bush was starting two wars, the embassy/consulate attacks in 11 places with 60 deaths, where was the outrage over wiretapping and water-boarding.   Where were you then?   Where were you when science was disregarded and our fed departments were taken over by Oral Roberts University grads.   Where was your outrage over Brownie?   Where's your outrage over religious factions trying to impose their values on all of us?
BLACK DRESS:
You don't know if I was outraged or not.   My POINT was, don't just blame the Republicans period.
BLUE SUIT: 
Ok! 80% Republicans, 20% Democrats.
BLACK DRESS:
I have never seen our country so divided.   This is not solely the fault of Republicans or Democrats but EVERYONE in office: Independent, Moderates, Liberals, Conservatives, et cetera.   And their division is dividing a once peaceful nation.   If we listen to rhetoric instead of thinking for ourselves, the war will be within our own nation's borders instead of some third world country.   American against American.   I never thought I'd see the day that could happen.   While we may disagree on issues, the way our nation was designed was to balance ALL parties needs and beliefs, not one or another.   That's why our forefathers had the foresight to build a democracy, and we're about to let our leaders - both sides - tear it apart.   Think about your friends and neighbors instead of who's at fault.   If your friend or neighbor has differing views from you, would you be willing to go to war with them?   Perhaps to the death? Be careful, be careful.
BLUE SUIT: 
What, exactly, did the Democrats do to cause this?   They refused to accept a shutdown of a legally passed law?   Ah, I see...   Not.   I thought you were leaving?
POLKA-DOT DRESS:
Repubs now represent many who live in carefully carved out districts with complex shapes.   And this, is your idea of how our country should work?
BLUE SUIT: 
So the government will open tomorrow.   Good!   The ACA is intact.   Good!   Cruz was appropriately knocked down.   Good!   The Tea Party lost a BIG ONE!   Very BIG... VERY Good!   We have to go through all this again in January, February.   Very, very BAD!   Let's hope the extreme side of the Republican legislature got the shit knocked out of them enough so that they tuck their tail between their legs and go away.   But don't hold your breath.  Maybe you'd better hold your breath until the stench passes.
POLKA-DOT DRESS:

Is the shutdown ending?   I haven't heard.   However, a repeat next year, while bad, would still have the appropriate effect on Republican candidates in November.   I'm concerned that in the time between now and then, they will be presenting all sorts of excuses for themselves and thinking that "we the people" have forgotten how stupide and infantile they acted .   I have better things to do.   See ya' later.

Wednesday, June 5, 2013

Red shoes and green tule


The following conversations took place while waiting for my boss's wedding party in the vestibule of St. Rose of the Meadow Church.  I will identify the speakers by their colorful hats  (yellow straw, purple felt, white flowers, green tule, et cetera) or their clothing colors (lavender suit, orange and yellow print dress, tan suit, et cetera).

purple felt hat:
Basically she said to the lesbian heckler, "Oh, you wanna talk?  Well, you can have the mic if you really want it.  No?  Ok."  Then she asked the audience, "Y'all want her to talk?"   
peach and yellow print dress:
Sounds about right.  Pretty much what most of America would do in the face of a self-important person interrupting their speech and making demands.
tan suit:
In not so many ways Mrs. Obama told that woman and the rest of the country...  "You can play that disrespectful BS with my husband but I'm not going to play those games with you!" 
lavender suit:
But threatening to walk out on the audience where everyone has paid $500 to hear you is not quite confronting a heckler.
green tule:
She should try not acting like a spoiled, inconsiderate and rude child having a temper tantrum when grownups are talking.
lavender suit:
Okay.  The heckler was wrong.  There are more appropriate methods of getting your message across.
man in blue suit:
My people are from the Chicago.  You don't ever wanna' mess with Chicago thugs.
peach and yellow print dress: 
She handled it beautifully. Well done Mrs. Obama.  Wing-nuts like that dike have nothing left but meaningless snarky remarks.
man in tan suit:
She may not have handled it beautifully she handled it pretty well.
green tule:
Michelle is the epitome of class. 
lavender suit:
Diva-ness.
purple felt hat:
That was no place for such rowdiness.
man in tan suit:
Yeah, I thought it was pure rudeness.  This is about good manners at a private event.  The paying-guest protestor should have been thrown out on her butt after her first outburst.  She was plain rude.  Cable news pundits are not models on how to make a point in a civil manner.  She was and is a model embarrassment to all activists.
There are appropriate times and inappropriate times to protest. 
man in blue suit:
Any time you are rude or disrespectful, it's the wrong time.
red shoes:
The heckler did at least distract everyone from the truly awful, rambling speech Michelle was giving.  Did she prepare it or was it written for her?  Oh, and I didn't hear anything "dignified" about the way she reacted, unless there's some new definition I'm unaware of.
peach and yellow print dress: 
Well, the bottom line is that her heckling did her cause more harm than good.  Not a smart move.  Hecklers never do anything positive for their causes.  Their need to be heard is more often just a plea for "me-me-me" to be in the spotlight.  They just piss-off people who are there to hear somebody else.
man in tan suit:
If the bitch had dropped the mike, that would've been sweet.
man in brown jacket:
$500 Buys you a seat, not a microphone.
red shoes:
We're all just sitting around waiting for Obama to take all the money from we rich and give it to the poor.  After we rich have no more to give maybe they'll take it from the middle class and give it all to the government like they do in the other corrupt countries where the people have no say.
man in blue suit:  (Whispering to red shoes.)
Darling maybe you should think quietly from here on out.
red shoes:
Stop it Horrace!  Once the government employees have it, they can spend it on $15 chicken wings and $9 craft beers in downtown DC and two million dollar one bedroom apartments.... wait a minute, they're doing now!
man in blue suit:  (Whispering to red shoes.)
Mildred!  Please!  This is my boss's wedding!
red shoes:
His fifth.  And she's half his age!
green tule:
Can we get back to the crazy, angry lesbian confronting the equally angry First Lady!
man in tan suit:
The White House transcript failed to report Michelle's line to her hostess: "Hold my carrots, I'm goin' down to smack this broad."
peach and yellow print dress:
To which there was applause and cheering.
pink suit with green scarf:
I'd pay big money to see Michelle bitch-slap Michelle Bachmann and Sarah Palin.  Large money.
man in tan suit:
I'd double that!
lavender suit:
I read it as the Obamas saying, "Thanks for the $5000 and all your election support but we don't actually care about your issue and you need to leave."
man in tan suit:
More like: "You should act with a little decorum, lady.  But by all means, feel free to make a fool of yourself and your cause with weird, disconnected noises."
man in blue suit:
The les was low class.  What do Presidents do?  
red shoes:
Ronny told them to "Shut-up!"
man in tan suit:
He wasn't Pres then.  He was a candidate and candidates can say anything they want to get to the presidency.  Ask Mitt!
peach and yellow print dress:
Presidents with class keep their cool or in President Obama's case engage them with the right of Free Speech.  If that doesn't work then wait a moment for the nut job to be escorted out.
lavender suit:
Really?  Do you expect me to believe that crap?
man in tan suit:
The President and the First Lady should never have to back down to idiot hecklers.  Barack and Michelle, just like Dubya and Laura, have worked hard to get where they are.  The office demands respect.
red shoes:
Ellen Sturtz and her group will now get all the attention she could have ever wanted from the government.  The fact, however that they'll all be low level government IRS employees giving her that attention might prove inconvenient.
purple felt hat: 
You've been listening to too much Rush Limberger.  Is that Musk you've sprayed the area with?
man in blue suit:
Hell hath no fury....  I'd love to see any photos of the look Michelle flashed the lesbian.  Her lips curled up on the side.  Eye brows raised.  Barack knows what I mean.
red shoes:
Classy.   Indeed!?
man in tan suit:
You're a sick person.
peach and yellow print dress: 
Watch your attitude lady.  By the way, who wears red shoes to a wedding?
pink suit with green scarf:
Well, that escalated quickly.
pink suit with yellow scarf arm in arm with pink suit with green scarf:
Pay no attention to them, darling.  Here comes the wedding party.  Soon we'll be able to walk down the aisle together just as they are.

Wednesday, April 17, 2013



I support common-sense steps to reduce gun violence

We've shown that our voices are louder if we, more than 90% of us, speak together.






Friday, February 22, 2013

While waiting to get 'clipped'.


Barber: Matt
Barber: Jeff
Customers: Harry, Dr. Jack, Mort, Tom and Kerry:.

(It's Friday morning.  I'm sitting in my barber's shop waiting to get 'clipped'*.  There are two barbers, Matt and Jeff, and six customers: Harry, Mort, Jack, Tom and a walk-in, Kerry.  I, Seamus, am number six.  With the din of chatter and laughter among the men, I am unable to read my book.  Matt, my barber of twenty-seven years, used to have nothing but golf related magazines neatly stacked on the magazine rack.  They have been replaced by National Review, Field and Stream, Shooting Times and The Weekly Standard magazines and the latest edition of my employer's newspaper.  My, how times have changed attitudes and reading tastes.  In my line of work, I am a political columnist for a local newspaper, I get enough political news on the job.  Today, as usual, I will use my "out of the office" time to close my eyes and listen.  I vowed long ago to not get into any heated discussions especially here, where razors are tools.  I just sit and listen to the varied opinions: usually on guns and politics, never on food or books of the month.  But today is a little different.  This is the town where I chose to live.)
*(Another "Word on the Street" in the making?)

Matt:  (Clipping Mort's hair in chair #1.)
Yeah, the fishing was great, the cabins and food were better than Ah' expected.  We did a lot of flying in floatplanes to the back waters.  The scenery was  incredible: moose, eagles, and the grizzly bears!
Mort:
D'j'a do any huntin'?  Moose?  Bear?
Matt: 
Naw.  We weren't equipped for that.  Just fishin'.
Harry
Kinda' tackle d'j'a take?
Jeff:  (Clipping Harry's hair in chair #2.)
Took different rod-and-reel combinations.  Had to be prepared for any situation.  For the rainbow trout and grayling, I brought my ultralight spinning outfit rigged with 4-pound-test line.
Matt: 
For salmon, pike, and char, Ah' took ma' medium-action spinning rig.
Jeff:
Jerry brought his 7-foot heavy rod and level wind bait-casting reel filled with 20-pound-test for the king salmon he caught.
Tom:
Mary and I boated 289 peacocks during our week on the River Plate: the largest going twenty pounds.  
Mort:
You hunted peacocks?  Those beautiful, fantastic birds we see in the zoo?  How could you do that?  They should take your gun away from you.
Tom:
Fish!  We were fishing for peacock bass on the wild and exotic Amazon River!  
Mort: 
I don't do any fishing or hunting.  What about you Dr. Jack?  Do you fish?
Dr. Jack: (Flipping through one of the magazines.) 
Nope.  Too busy. (Changing the subject.) Mort you're a Political Science professor what do you think of Obama's drone program?  Bush didn't use them often and, in my opinion, we are better off because for that.  I don't think drones in the hands of people like Cheney and Rumsfeld would have been a good idea.  Obama, Biden and Holder may be guilty of political hypocrisy, but I appreciate that they are now fighting the right enemy with the right weapon.
Harry
Ah' agree.  
Mort:
I think if we are going to vote on gun control, I think we should include denying control of drones in the hands of Tea Party politicians.
Tom:
I thought we were talking about fish!
Matt:
We were, but ...
Mort:
I think we should be talking about the food we eat.  
Jeff:
Food!  What's the matter with the food we eat?
Mort:  (Reading the newspaper he brought.)
I'm reading an article in the New York Times ...see here.... An article by Mike Moss about the science of addictive junk food.
Harry
That's what ya' get fer readin'.
Matt:
I don't eat junk food.
Jeff:
What about the Big Mac you had for lunch?
Matt:
That's not junk.  Ya' get two 100% pure, probably good Iowa beef patties, with a special sauce on a sesame seed bun.  Ya' top that with melted good old American cheese, some crisp lettuce, minced onions and grandma's pickles.  What's more American than that?
Mort:
That beef for that Big Mac you had for lunch was factory farmed and fed antibiotics and other chemicals.
Harry
Ah' been workin' cattle ranches 'n' eatin' corn fed beef all ma'h life 'n' ne'er been sick a day.
Mort: 
What about that can of Coke and the bag of Doritos corn chips you just consumed before you got in that chair?
Harry
What 'bout 'em?  Ah' drink three ta' six cans, sometimes more on hot days, ever' day.
Dr. Jack:
Every Coke should be taxed to account for all the kidney dialysis I prescribe and foot and toe and leg  amputations I and other doctors perform because of Coke's contribution to Type II diabetes.
Jeff:
He's right there.  But it's not all Coke's fault.  Doritos, even orange juice and sandwich bread can lead to Type II diabetes just as surely as smoking Marlboros lead to lung cancer.
Mort:
Says here... Food made of refined carbohydrates, from orange juice to multi-grain sandwich bread to breakfast cereal, is just as addictive as tobacco and also the source of tremendously high medical costs.  You're right there, Doc.
Tom:
Ya' know.  You may have something there.  The breakfast cereal I used to eat every day, Wheaties...
Harry
Ahhhh, The breakfast of champions.  Yeah, Ah' used to eat 'em ever' mornin'... Ah' was just a kid then....
Tom:
Anyway, as I was saying... they just didn't taste like they used to, when I was a kid.
Harry
Now, ever' mornin' Ah' have a tall stack o' flapjacks, merple serple, butter, four eggs, over easy, baiycon, sausage, Orida tater tots...
Dr. Jack:
When were you last in a doctor's office for an exam?
Harry
When Ah' had ma' tonsils tuk out.  Nineteen 'n' fifty...
Mort:
This is all happening as a result of the genetic manipulation of all our most basic foods.  Wheat is our most basic.  Wheat flour is used to make almost all of our breads.  
Matt:
Most of our breakfast cereals.  Wheaties.
Jeff:
Pancakes.  God I love my pancakes every Sunday morning.  Maple syrup.  I do have my required weekly portion of fruit on top, though.
Mort:  
We aren't eating our grandmother's wheat.  Says here that wheat has been genetically engineered to not only withstand Roundup, but to also bind to the opiate receptors in our brains so that we become addicted to it!   
Harry
D'j'u say opium?
Mort:
No.  Opiate receptors.  Dr. Jack tell him what an opiate receptor is.
(Enter Kerry.)
Dr. Jack:
Opiate receptors are a type of protein found in the brain, spinal cord and gastrointestinal tract.  They, in a sense welcome, if you will, drugs.  Opiates facilitate pain relief and stimulate the pleasure centers in our brains that signal reward.  The more you consume the drug the more you want: hence addiction.  When a person orally ingests, eats, addictive food, say sugar and today's wheat for instance, it travels quickly through the bloodstream to the brain.  The receptors say, "Hey welcome to the brain, let's have a party.  Send more drugs."  Understand, Harry?
Harry
Can we get back to drones.  Ah'd ruther be addicted ta' drones than have ma' neice or nephews wearin' the combat boots on the ground... so ta' speak.
Mort:
Many other of our basic fruits and vegetables are also being modified.  Scary!  Huh?
Tom:
I think we have either never tasted or have forgotten what real food is and it's time to pressure the industry and our so-called legislative representatives to stop poisoning us..., and our children.
Dr. Jack:
The addiction is the insulin rush from the sugar and it doesn't matter where the sugar comes from.
Matt:
A year ago, I had serious dental surgery, remember?
Jeff:
Yeah.  You were a pain in the ass.
Matt:
Yeah, I was.  For three weeks before the surgery and ten days after.  I couldn't eat nothing but ice cream, and some soup.  Wonderful, I thought, I adore chocolate ice cream.  I proceeded to eat chocolate ice cream by the half gallon... morning, noon and night.  Loved every minute of it.  Except that at the end of the ten days, when I could go back to normal food, I realized that I wanted, craved!, in the worst way, nothing but chocolate ice cream.  I wanted it so bad, so much, that I actually went out and bought two half-gallons.  What?  They were on sale!  They're not huge containers, but I ate one that night.  It was instantly clear that I had an addiction.  
Harry
You were hooked!
Matt:
But then I researched the ingredients, and understood why.  And I said, "Self, cold turkey is required here."  Which is what I did, and after a week of resisting temptation, the craving passed.  Do you know the awful things listed on the labels?  Guar gum.  What the hell is guar gum?  
Dr. Jack:
Although it is still used in small amounts as a food thickener and binder, as in ice cream, the use of guar gum as an ingredient in non-prescription diet aids was officially banned in the early 1990s by the FDA.  It would bind with liquids in the stomach and swell, causing a feeling of satisfying fullness.  This swollen mass could also cause dangerous intestinal and duodenal blockages.  Guar gum was declared ineffective and unsafe for use as a non-prescription, over the counter, diet aid.  
Harry
Do you think the cops should use drones to catch crooks?
Matt:
And my ice cream had ice structuring proteins in it.  It's prepared with a genetically modified baker’s yeast. 
Mort:
Yeast!  I thought they used that only for baking.  And then to genetically change it!  What's that all about?
Jeff:
Yeah!  These companies are no different from the tobacco companies, and until there is a serious national reaction to stop them, nothing will change. 
Tom:
Maybe it will take a guy like New Jersey's Chris Christie to do it.  
Dr. Jack:
The guy needs a serious mano a mano with his physician, and a strictly held diet.  
Mort:
I wonder to what foods he is addicted.  
Jeff:
Probably Atlantic City boardwalk junk foods.
Dr. Jack:
I have to say that I absolutely loathe the Girl Scout cookie season.  As parents of Girl Scouts, we, especially Alice, is under tremendous pressure to organize cookie sales as a way for the girls to raise funds and learn money management skills.  We know that the cookies are highly addictive and completely unhealthy.  And we knew they were contributing to the obesity problem in this country.  I can tell you right now that the most popular cookies - Thin Mints, Samoas, and Tagalongs - have the highest fat content.  Any surprise?  Or course not.  I will not allow them in my house.  It's a successful but bad business model: take advantage of little girls in their cute little uniforms, put them out there in front of the supermarket smiling and begging versus the Americans with food addictions.  But my conscience, as a doctor, screams out that this is bad news.
Jeff:
Hypocrisy rears its ugly head.
Matt:
There is nothing wrong with junk food in moderation.
Jeff:
I seriously think that addiction has now become the de facto excuse for any kind of mental or social behavior issue.
Kerry:
Are you talking about Moss's article in the times?
Mort:
Yeah.  
Kerry:
Damn.  He's right on.  The addiction to processed foods has permanently corrupted the American palate.  I don't eat the foods mentioned in the article because I find them inedible.  And most of the time indigestible.
Mort:
For a long time I couldn't eat bread from any of the local bakeries, let alone Safeway.  Safeway baked goods (I hesitate to call them 'goods') are the worst, everything on their bakery shelves tastes the same.
Kerry:
My job takes me all over the world.  Just got back to the States from Europe.  The huge assortment of "food-like stuff" here is incredible.  I would not touch any of it if I were starving.  Even some of my friends so-called home-cooked food is usually over sweet or over salted and/or just plain bland.
Matt:
Different people have different tastes.
Kerry:
I know but they eat only what they are exposed to.  
Dr. Jack:
At least, when I go to the city it is full of great Chinese, Spanish and Indian groceries and restaurants. 
Kerry:
But I have been to places in the Midwest where I literally could not find anything to eat. 
Mort:
How about studying "world foods" as an elective in high school?
Harry
Ah' want ya' ta' know Ah'm part Cherokee.  Ma' great grandma was a Cherokee.  But she weren't just no squaw.  She was kinda like a shaman, ya' know, a priest a' sorts.  She told my pappy this story and he tole' it again ta' me.  This ole' elder was teachin' his children about life.  A fight is going on inside ya',” she tole 'im.  Its a terrible battle and its between two wolves: the evil wolf 'n' the good wolf.  The evil wolf is anger 'n' envy, greed 'n' arrogance, guilt 'n' resentment, lies 'n' big ego.  A few other things Ah' cain't remember.  The other, he says, is the good wolf.  He's joy 'n' peace, love 'n' hope, humility, kindness 'n' truth, generosity, passion 'n' faith.  She looks at ma' pappy 'n' she says "The same fight is going on inside you, Jerome."  That was his name, Jerome. 'N' inside every other person you know, or will ever know.  Now Ah'm kinda slow, ya' know, so, when pappy tole' me this story, Ah' thought about it, 'n' I slept on what he said.  Next mornin' I asked him, “Which wolf is gonna' win?”  Pappy said "Why son its the one you feed.”  Ah' said, "If that evil wolf is inside me 'n' Ah' feed it, does that mean that evil wolf will kill me?"  If you want evil to win, yes.  Now Ah' don't think feedin' that wolf Doritos 'n' Coke is gonna' matter one teeny bit.  Do you?
Dr. Jack:
I don't think you understand... uh... sorry, didn't catch your name...
Harry
Harry.  Harry Rheems.  
Dr. Jack:
I don't think you understand, Harry...
Harry 
Oh, Ah' understand alright, Doc.  Ya' see, Ah' know y'all's talkin' about food, but Ah' was keepin' on drones.  Now ya' see, like you doc, I don't think drones in the hands of people like Cheeney and Rumsfeld would be a good idea.  Those two men kep' feedin' that evil wolf inside a' them all their lives, 'n' then they saw the opportunity to spread their evil.  Dubya was also feedin' his evil wolf, that was Karl Rove.  Dubya still won't apologize to us for his falsehoods, ya' know,... weapons of mass destruction.
Jeff:  (Removing the Barber apron and handing Harry a mirror.)
There you go, Harry.  How does that look?
Harry
Handsome ole' devil, ain't Ah'?  Well, fella's, Ah'm just passin' through.  On ma' way to ma' pappy's funeral north up o' here.
Matt: 
Sorry for your loss, Harry.  
Jeff:  (As Harry exits.)
Yes.  Hope to see you again, Harry.
Mort:
Strange ole' fella', huh.
Matt:
If he'd a' stayed any longer we'd all be a'talkin' lack 'im.
Dr. Jack:
He's a lot smarter than he looks.
Jeff:
Or sounds.
Mort:
Yup.
Tom:
Yes'siree, Bob.
(Lights down.)
(END)














Tuesday, February 5, 2013

Me ... in a fitness club...?

(Overheard in a Fitness Club in Sacramento, California.  I am seated on one of 24 Stamina Airgometer Exercise Bike (Google Affiliate Ad) .  Music can be heard in the background:  Slow to start but fast and intensive toward the end.)


BEN
Did anyone read the story on the internet about the fifty odd countries involved in renditioning... to torture... 
MONICA  (Interrupting.)
What a wonderful idea the Geneva Convention was...too bad we don't follow the rules of war anymore, and too bad after breaking those rules we fought so hard to instate, we are not being held accountable.  I can imagine the cries from American citizens if...  say Iran went into Iraq or Israel and conducted itself in the manner we have in Afghanistan and Iraq... the cries would be so loud for the obliteration of that nation it would be deafening...  
HARRY  (Interrupting.)
You don't know...
MONICA
Let me finish my thought, PLEASE! ...however when we are responsible for what we are constantly brainwashed into believing only other nations would do, all of a sudden we are left dumbstruck not knowing what to say or do, because somehow we just can't bring ourselves to believe this is the government we have been taught to revere and respect.  That America you are dreaming about, like that lost love you wish to recapture after many years...does not exist anymore.  We should no longer be under that hypnotic spell...what will it take to help us open our eyes and reclaim our nation and the principles we like to imagine we once had. 
MIKE
When you refuse to impeach Bush/Cheney because we invaded Iraq.  When you refuse to prosecute neocons who lied to Congress so that they could attack Iraq.
When you don't uphold the laws of the land.  When you don't drive discredited offenders out of the halls of power, they return to the public stage,...
JOE  (Interrupting.)
Despite the attempt to again hang this all on Bush and undoubtedly make an issue that will divert attention from all of the negatives we are dealing with in this country under the current administration.
THEO
It's too bad that ignorance isn't painful you wont see Bush or Cheney or Rummy vacationing overseas anytime... ever because they tortured...
HARRY  (Interrupting.)
Torture?  Most of them deserved to be tortured in order for our county to be safe!  The Libs keep blaming Bush for everything but you notice who's still implementing many of his policies?  If anyone is being tortured it's the U.S. citizens under this pathetic administration!
NICK ANDERSON: 
The Houston Chronicle's editorial cartoonist
http://blog.chron.com/nickanderson/2012/09/drone-strike/
BARRY
And on the same day comes the BBC News report that our Department of Justice - that American Drone strikes against Americans are legal?  Our government officials can authorize the killing of Americans abroad if they are members of al-Qaeda or its allies?  WOW


PATRICIA
The war crimes of Bush/Cheney/Rummy: continued by Obama/Biden/Hillary.
THEO
Birds of a feather flock together.  I just pray that I will still be a live when the whole truth comes out about the Bush years and 911.  He hasn't been out of his gated compound since he went there.
MONICA
As Dostoevsky said of such men, "Nothing is easier than cutting off heads, and nothings harder than to have an idea." 
HARRY
If Bush asked the host nations to sign a letter saying they won't torture (wink wink), he'd be Obama!  Change you can wink about.  God bless Dubya, he kept us safe!
PATRICIA
Stalkers are everywhere.  
HARRY
Under executive orders issued by Obama, the CIA still has authority to carry out renditions, secret abductions, and transfers of prisoners to countries that cooperate with the United States.  Much like the Nazi's of yore.  The Obama administration has determined that the rendition program was one component of the Bush administration's war on terrorism that would not be discarded.  Obama left intact renditions as a counter-terrorism tool.
JOE
Uh-oh...  The German government and the German people are really seriously absolutely not going to like that.
What I'm amazed at is that Bush outsourced it to other countries rather than to Halliburton and other warmongering for-profit corporations.  I wouldn't be surprised to find that Bush placed a condition on the outsourcing that the countries had to contract with U. S. corporations as part of the torture.  I mean, free market and all.
SCARLET
Wow.  They really held onto this until they needed to cover an Obama scandal-- shades of Bill Clinton.
Guess they're trying to trump Obama killing Americans with drones.  Didn't work.  We Democrats don't forget.
DAVE
Nor should you, but why are people willing to give Bush & Cheney a pass in their eagerness to pillory Obama? Sounds like they've got an agenda aside from justice.
DUNCAN
Where have you been for the past four years?
MONICA
Apparently we don't learn from past history.  If anything, the Inquisition taught us that people will tell you anything you want to hear to stop the torture.  Not and often not, the truth.
DUNCAN
We all cheer every time a known terrorist is killed.  But nobody really wants to know how we found them.  If you think we would have found Bin Laden without all of these awful procedures that began prior to Obama's first term, you are sadly mistaken.
BEN
I'll never vote Republican again.  Especially after that lyin' bastard Romney!  I just hope that three-some and their minions get their due.  If not here on Earth, then forever in the afterlife.
DUNCAN
Red Team Torture.  Blue Team Drones.
JOE
Bush invaded Iraq based on his faulty intelligence.  The rest was oil and political currency in the Middles East.  But Congress hamstrung the the military so hard that there was no way that they could have succeeded.
MONICA  (To DUNCAN.)
They tortured!  Renditioned!  What criminals!   
HARRY
Fight terror with terror!  You can be soft and can't show weakness.  I’ll bleed on the American flag to keep the stripes red.
MIKE
Bad when Bush did it.  Ok when Obama does it.
GLORIA
911 Was the fault of the U. S., CIA, etc..  They had reports of the perps taking flying lessons but no landing lessons & never followed thru.  Also airline people didn't report one way tickets bought by Mid Eastern people & so on.  Everybody was asleep at the switch.
PATRICIA
I respectfully disagree, US and CIA new exactly what was happening.  The GOP helps those that don't need it! 
We knew of things like that early and most people were for it or nobody seemed to care or too scared to speak up.  This stuff wasn't a secret but Bush for a long time was a teflon President.  He was the leader in the fight of terrorism and anybody that spoke up about it was for the enemy.  Wasn't he the "decider"?!
GLORIA
Common Sense is not so Common.  Some of you on the right support Rove's experiment that the GOP can create their own reality, ala Romney's campaign, and their base will embrace it hook, line and sinker.  They refuse to acknowledge that the Iraq war was one of choice and a bad choice at that... it cost this nation a lot of young lives, billions of dollars that could be used here and will continue to cost for the care of those maimed for life.  The right has gone off the reality track and are wrong on virtually every issue confronting our nation today!
HARRY
I am proud of my country everyday.  Some more than others.  Especially when it comes to killing terrorists or gathering information from terrorists.  I'm glad that both parties do whatever it takes to terrorist to keep me and my family safe...if its water boarding?  I say, where's the bucket, rope and water?  If its electric shock, I say, Where's the plug?  They are given more rights than they would give me!
MONICA
We pause now for a brief message from the dark ages.
MIKE
Yeah, HARRY, you would have been a good companion for William Calley in My Lai.  Same basic mentality.
DUNCAN
So uncool.  He should just drone them, like a gentleman.
GLORIA
Obama is just cleaning the mess Bush left, he just got in to office guys.  And the brick walls the Repubs are throwing up, don't help.
MONICA
Football season is over.  Republicans gathered in their political graves today to keep TV ratings up, just televise 10 hrs of torture every Sunday.  And, of course, 30 commercials every weekday to remind us of the great "Torture Sunday" leading to "Torture Bowl" in February.
KATE
Bush's response to 911 started a reactionary global revolution against American intervention.  Obama's perpetuates it and now the results are really showing themselves in Pakistan, Yemen and North Africa.  If you like "expensive failures", you should love these two men.
PETE
They kept you safe.  Stop whining and just say thank you!
MONICA
Another Kentuckian?  When Bush left office he told Oprah that he missed being pampered.
DAVE
Can anyone else remember when we were able to take pride in our country?
MONICA
I'm pretty sure that was before I was born.  And this ... tomorrow ... shall pass.  Maybe you would prefer North Korea or China?
THEO
In other news today: Obama Justice Department "Memo: Government can kill Americans with no plans to attack U. S.  But it's cool because those who do plan to attack U.S. won't be water-boarded so that co-conspirators can be stopped.
MITCH
Loud, Proud and Country by the grace of God.  It's so much more legitimate now that we can send drones to kill American citizens in other countries.  How long will it be before they send a drone after you GLORIA?
GLORIA
Another foreign country heard.  Kentuck?  You even look like a Kentucky toad.  Ignorance  and inbreeding costs more than an education.  Bush-Cheney-Rumsfeld!  The gruesome three-some.  The world, in its gratitude awarded Obama The Nobel Peace Prize just in gratitude that those three wouldn't be running things anymore.
HARRY
Thanks to these policies, there have been no terrorist attacks in the US since 9/11.  I'd like to thank President Bush and Vice President Cheney for doing what needed to be done.  We torture because it works and has always worked.  Very few people are trained to resist and even fewer among those actually can resist.  May our enemies writhe in agony for daring to cause us harm.  
DUNCAN
What do you think about finally realizing that our federal government is actually "the evil empire" all the Middle Eastern nations accuse us of being?
THEO
Pay no attention to the decision to allow drone strikes against United States citizens!  Look at the old WORLD torture methods!  The rack.  The screws!
MIKE
Team New World Order back in the headlines.  How refreshing?  I would rather have a stick in my eye.
HARRY
Now you know how we Republicans feel living under the Obama regime.
SARAH
Read the book "Shock Doctrine" by Naomi Klein.  She does an excellent job of documenting the process of installing policies that increase governmental suspension of rights and corporate agendas while a nation is in a state of shock.
GLORIA
Anger is fear turned inward.  Many in this nation don't need to be in a state of shock to fall for the bullpucky that is shoveled day in and day out.
HARRY
And Obama gets to kill Americans with drones.  No trial.  No court order.  No questions asked policy.  Which is worse? Drones or rendition?
GLORIA
I am pleased that these hideous programs have finally hit the light of day for public purview.  
PAMELA
"The United States does not torture prisoners", is an incredibly misleading statement, in light of renditions and drones.
HARRY
Obama has a new policy: Take no prisoners!  Much more effective, eh?  That will should make you happier!  
OLIVER
Do you live in such a fantasy world to think this doesn't happen?  Secret interrogations started long before Bush, and are still carried on with Obama...
BEN
ALERT!  ALERT!  B/S Detector!  Bush supplied whatever was in that vial Powell held up in front of the UN.   Saddam Hussein had trained al Qaeda in biological and chemical warfare.  Bush later invaded Iraq in part based on his faulty intelligence.  Our leaders lied us into that war, plain and simple.  Same as Netanyahu is doing right now with Iran.  
GLORIA
Children, children.... think before you speak!  There are pictures of men in orange jump-suits with black bags over their heads.  If they were Americans in Syria or Libya we would be up in arms.  Why do we just accept it because they are not Americans?
HARRY
"They hate us for our freedom."
MONICA
What a joke.  I'm finished.  I'm going home to my loving husband and my kids.
GLORIA
No, they hate us for our hypocrisy, for our narcissistic, self-centered and hypocritical foreign policy that acknowledges the rights of some, but not of all, peoples. 
PATRICIA
The Iranians hate us for overthrowing their democratically elected government in the 1950s and putting in place the Shah whose brutal regime killed off hope of democracy and human rights all because the U.S. and Britain didn't want Iranians to own their own oil fields.  Sorry, but BP's right to profit trumps all else, as we most recently experienced in the Gulf.  I'm outta' here, too, Monica.
DAVE
The Egyptians hate us for propping up a dictator who refused his people basic rights like freedom of speech and whose security forces freely tortured/killed political detainees.  
HARRY
It goes on and on and on.  They will continue hating us as long as we, yes that's we, as in all of us, allow our government to do these things.
SCARLET
The GOP, according to our new ruler, Grover Norquist, is going to reduce government to a size that can be drowned in a bathtub, but happily spend money and government resources on rendition which violates basic premises on which this country was founded.  It's absolutely maddening.
(The music stops.)
(END)